Settling the estate, Part 3 lies, lies and alibis

Prior to receiving our letters of administration to be executors of my mother’s estate, my brother signed an agreement, as did I, that read:

“That all business is to be transacted by the EXECUTORS in their PERSONAL capacity, and NO surrogate shall have the authority to ACT IN PLACE of one or the other executor…”.

This did not include the help of professionals like attorneys, accountants, realtors, etc. my attorneys added this specifically to make Satan’s power of Attorney over my brother completely useless in this context but of course like all narcissists, Satan doesn’t like playing by the rules.

The agreement signed by both me, my brother and my aunts. All identifying info has been redacted.

People have a certain way about them when they express themselves that can be detected even in writing. I know how my brother talks and articulates himself. I know how he acts. I know how he is. I know there are certain things I can say to him that will trigger him. I know that the person I was talking to via this new email address was not him.

Starting the day after my mom’s wake every single place I called in regards to my mother would tell me that they had already spoken to Satan. I called her bank, her money market accounts, her cell phone provider, etc., and everyone said they had already spoken to Satan and they called her by name. Even though she never legally took my brother’s last name, she was conveniently using it to make these calls so it sounded like she was the child of my mother. Why was this stranger calling up on my mom’s behalf? The most sickening part of all of this was that my so-called Aunts were WELL AWARE of the fact that my mom did not want my brother’s wife involved in her affairs, yet they all sat there and supported her being involved. Not only did they support her but they actually encouraged it.

My attorneys were aware of my concerns that my brother had made a new email address and that I didn’t think I was speaking to him, and so their advice to me was to wait until we had received the letters of administration, and to ask him if we can meet up somewhere to discuss the estate. Although I didn’t have the letters yet, I did not want to be accused of not communicating, and so I wrote back suggesting we meet up somewhere in order to discuss things, and in response to my email this is what I got back.

“I will be unavailable to meet person as I will be handling most of the estate via email and/or my attorney. Per my attorney, I will only be needed in person to open the bank account and to attend the closing. 

I have twice sent you copies of bills that I’ve paid and bills that need to be paid. Please send me the same from your end. If email isn’t good for you, you can send them to me via USPS.  

Please email me your questions and or concerns that you wanted to discuss. I will review them and consult my attorney if needed, then send you my response.”

At this point it was becoming more and more clear that my brother was not the person in whom I was speaking with. The fact I can tell by the way he was speaking, coupled with his refusal meet with me in person or talk on the phone, strongly suggested that it was Satan who was acting as a wizard of oz,of sorts, hiding behind the curtain of a fake email address. I printed my brother’s email and took it to my attorney’s office and on August 18th 2017, I sent my brother this email.

[brother], 

I just sat down with my attorney who called your attorney while I was there. Your attorney agreed that we need to meet up to discuss how this estate is going to be settled as CO-executors. I already asked you when you can meet up and was told you would be “unavailable” and your attorney advised you that you’d only need to be present to open the bank account and for the closing. That is not what he just told my attorney on the phone. He also informed us that you received ten official copies of the letters yet you never responded to my email where I told you I didn’t have copies. You never informed me that you had copies. I just want to remind you that you signed an agreement. Please pay close attention to numbers 2 & 3 on that agreement. We HAVE to do this together and communicate. If you are looking to save money by not hiring a real estate agent and wanted to get money off the last months insurance, your refusal to communicate with me is going to cost more than any amount we can save. We are both on the letters. Let’s not waste mom’s hard earned money on lawyer’s, as you said when you emailed me back in March. I have a pretty flexible schedule so please let me know when you can meet up so we can start settling this estate the right way and get it done in a timely manner so we can move on with our lives.

P.s If you want to talk you can also call me. (XXX) XXX-XXXX that is much easier for me as I do not check my emails often. 

[me]

I had expressed in an earlier emailthat I had never received the copies of the letters that my attorneys had ordered. This was a whole other mess I had to investigate on my own. My brother sent me his first email on July 31st. I never replied. On August 9th he resent the same email only he edited the first paragraph from, “I spoke with my attorney this past week. He advised that all surrogate court is waiting for is your original signature on

the settlement agreement, which your lawyer stated you would be signing shortly. The papers will be issued shortly after they get it, I assume” to vaguely say, “The court has all the papers and everything is set to go now.”. The fact that he had edited the first paragraph made me question why he did so and so I decided to call the surrogates court myself and I found out that ten copies of the letters had been sent to my brother’s attorney by accident, instead of mine. I had sent an email to my brother stating that I didn’t have the letters yet and my “brother” opted not to tell me that he had received them. Instead he vaguely wrote that everything was “set to go”. After that I had to go on a wild goose chase to get myself copies of the papers. I realized my name was spelled incorrectly, and so I had to make multiple trips back and fourth to the surrogates court in order to get that corrected. When I told my brother his copies were no good he refused to turn them in. He told me he had already given them out to some bill collectors but he wouldn’t tell me exactly who.

In my email I also pointed out numbers 2&3 of the agreement (see above)which were the paragraph I pasted above about each executor having to do all transactions in their own capacity, and another paragraph in which stated that we were both responsible for our own legal fees. This means that the money we paid to our attorneys came out of our pockets and not the estate. I was trying to point out that every time we had to call our attorneys for stupid nonsense like my brother’s refusal to speak to me, we were being charged for it. My brother did not seem to care however. In response to my email I received this from my “brother”….

“[me],

Yesterday, I received the certificates I requested. I would assume you would have requested your own copies. I will bring one for the bank and an extra one for you when we meet at [the bank] to open up an estate account. I will make an appointment at the [the bank] near my office, as I will be doing this on my lunch break. Once again, please send me the bills that need to be paid and also an itemized bill for what you have paid for the estate to date. I have sent you my copies twice. 

For the mail, I suggest we do change-of-addresses on all known accounts and creditors. Then, we can do a mail forward for everything else. We can either get a P.O. Box, or just have it forwarded to your address. 

Since most of the bills already come to my address and you have online access to those accounts, I’ll continue to receive them. You can have all the investments go to yours and provide me with online access. Feel free to call the investments and change address.

I would suggest meeting at the bank to open the estate account and get the bills paid, then we can take it from there. Paying the outstanding balances is the most pressing matter. 

Again please send me the list you have including address, account numbers and amounts due. I will write out envelopes for each and the bank can issue checks that day. Once I have your list, I will make the appropriate appointment. 

Thank you,

[my brother]”

Ugh, reading these emails again is getting my blood boiling. As you can see he was evading the whole part where I said that his attorney said that we needed to discuss these matters in person. He completely glazed right past it. The business like, robotic manner that this letter is written in is so bizarre, in and of itself. That is not the way my brother speaks or writes. This is the way in which all these emails were written. There was absolutely no emotion involved.

My brother was being very pushy. He was demanding that I give him a list of bills in which I paid and other bills that needed to be paid, meanwhile they had all the mail. My attorney’s advised me to go over all bills before paying them to make sure the claims are valid. I had no access to the bills since my brother was illegally stealing the mail since the day my mom passed. He was going online, pretending to be my mom, and doing illegal mail holds , and then authorizing himself to retrieve the mail at the post office. Basically he was impersonating my mom. He never informed the post office that my mom had passed. My attorney advised opening a PO box that we would both have access to. At first my brother fought it but now he was suddenly saying open it and have the mail forwarded there. This was a constant theme throughout the estate. “He” would say one thing and then completely change his mind days later. He even admits most of the bills were already coming to his house, which they shouldn’t have been. My brother was also demanding we pay the outstanding bills the same day we opened the bank account. He couldn’t even wait for the account to be opened and for the checks to come in the mail. He wanted the Bank to give us a few handwritten “starter checks”. I didn’t have any lists to give him at that point and my attorneys advised that there was no need for me to give them anything, especially since I still didn’t have my letters, and that they would take care of it. As far as my “online” access, I only had online access to my mom’s accounts because she gave me her email and passwords. I was not about to give them to these two sneaky liars. They were already in her mail. That was all they needed.

I knew my brother was not behind this email. My brother would never offer to write envelopes out and bring them to the bank! It was so ridiculous and completely unnecessary to do. This email has Satan written all over it. It’s written as if she’s the boss who is delegating tasks. This is a typical narcissist move. She’s telling me what I can do and what she is going to do. She has complete control although she’s trying to make it appear as if it equal by telling me I’m welcome to do, x,y,and z. She was basically assigning all the remedial tasks to me in an attempt to keep me busy and make me feel like I’m doing something. I don’t know what my brother told Satan about me but in the next few weeks I could see that she had no idea what type of person I am. She was about to see.

To be continued in the next post…..

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